Family Vacations Spell S.T.R.E.S.S.

Family vacations are suppose to be a source of bonding time-- a time where the family is able to come together and enjoy one another's company. How often has this happened? For me... not very often. This might explain a lack of family vacations in my family. Not only are they expensive and time consuming, they're often the source of an incredible amount of contention when things don't go according to plan or when not everyone wants to follow "the plan". It doesn't have to be this way! Even with stress preventing our full enjoyment,

For some reason, we find our crazy family vacation time invaluable. How can we ditch the stress of family vacation and FULLY enjoy ourselves then? As silly as it sounds, the answer is spelt R.E.L.A.X. Yeah, that's right... relax. I, of all people, have very little to preach about relaxation. I struggle with "going with the flow" as much as the next person stuck in my perfectionistic tendencies. I like plans. I like knowing what's going to happen next. Or I thought I did. I've been trying out a new lifestyle, if you will, for the last... mmmm... year? I haven't given up all my perfectionist tendencies. I'm still a straight A student (it's amazing what scholarship money can do to manipulate a person). I smooth out all the wrinkles in my bed after I make it. I love being on time (as in early) to everything. However, I've started letting go of the tendencies that hold me back from really enjoying life. I think it's these tendencies that keep many from enjoying their family vacations. We get so wrapped up in our perfect, ideal expectations that we forget to recognize the value in what we have in the moment. I have a solution. 

DITCH THE PLAN. 

Homeaway provides a wonderful 5 step plan for making your vacation wonderful, magical, excellent. 

1. Research your destinations as a family

2. Plan for down time

3. Set a realistic budget

4. Build in flexibility

5. Reclaim your schedule

This is a lot of planning for my earlier statement, so let me rephrase it once again: 

Make the plan and then ditch your attachment to the plan. 

While homeaway implies this in each of their steps, I would add to their steps that you need to involve the whole family in this planning. Ask your son to work out the finances. Put your daughter in charge of navigation. Dad might be over sleeping accommodations. Mom would take care of pre-traveling preparations. etc. Help as necessary, but no more than necessary. Why? Because not only does this provide a valuable learning experience for everyone, it allows everyone to be accountable for and invested in the vacation. It lets everyone have a say. 

"BUT things could and probably will go TERRIBLY WRONG!!!!"

That is correct. 

Let it go. 

It's okay, really.

Realize that your time together is more important than the things you get done. I mean... still exercise caution for heaven's sake (if your sister's getting married in under ten minutes, you might want to lovingly take control of the map). But if you end up in the middle of a Wyoming cow pasture rather than a Colorado ski hill on your next family vaca, stop. Look at the map. Let out a sigh to release any pent up negative emotions. and then laugh. A good, hearty laugh. Slap each other on the back. Break out the last bag of Doritos. Take a picture. Redirect. Wave goodbye to the cows. [these are not optional steps....]. And continue with life. 

Do not make family vacations a family crisis. Family vacations are what you make them. Make 'em good, yeah?